RECOGNIZING
THE PROBLEM
Every person has a "Pattern of Toxic Behaviour" that can significantly
damage the important and intimate relationships in his or her
life.
Therefore confess
your sins to each other and pray for each other so that
you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful
and effective.
James 5:16
|
Anger is one of our
ten (10) basic, God-given, emotions. This emotion can be CONSTRUCTIVE
or DESTRUCTIVE - depending upon our response. The focus of this
group is on giving Jesus a "NANO SECOND" (just one billionth of
a second!) to help us use all of our emotions according to God's
design for our lives. We can appropriately change our pattern
of relating to others and our responsibilities.
When most of us think of an "angry" person we think of someone
who destroys themselves and their relationships through uncontrollable
outbursts of rage. We usually picture someone who goes around
slamming doors, yelling loudly, and making life miserable for
everyone, including themselves. Yet this is only one part of anger,
as anger has many faces. Equally as damaging and destructive is
anger that is suppressed, or "stuffed," as it will only continue
to destructively influence our behaviours and attitudes. Ultimately,
even suppressed anger erupts from deep within the heart.
Recognizing and accepting responsibility for toxic patterns of
behaviour is the first hurdle to overcome as one runs the race
toward true freedom from anger. Walking through the recovery process
with Jesus Christ as our Higher Power allows us to admit our powerlessness
to control our anger, as well as trust that He will help us to
overcome our destructive habits.
Breaking the old patterns that have kept us locked into destructive
behaviour takes time. What took years to bring about will take
some time to change. But with Jesus Christ as our Higher Power,
and the willingness to allow Him to change our life, real freedom
from anger is possible!
Take a few minutes and complete a simple questionnaire. It may
reveal more about your anger than you realize. It may also be
the beginning of the healing that you're looking for! Return
to top
SELF-EVALUATION
The following inventory can help you in the recognition process
as you seek to determine whether your anger is reaching a destructive
level in your life.
Identify how many of the statements apply to you:
- I become impatient easily when things do not go according
to my plans.
- I tend to have critical thoughts toward others who don't agree
with my opinions.
- When I am displeased with someone I may shut down any communication
with them or withdraw entirely.
- I get annoyed easily when friends and family do not appear
sensitive to my needs.
- I feel frustrated when I see someone else having an "easier"
time than me.
- Whenever I am responsible for planning an important event,
I am preoccupied with how I must manage it.
- When talking about a controversial topic, the tone of my voice
is likely to become louder and more assertive.
- I can accept a person who admits his or her mistakes, but
I get irritated easily at those who refuse to admit their weaknesses.
- I do not easily forget when someone "does me wrong."
- When someone confronts me with a misinformed opinion, I am
thinking of my comeback even while they're speaking.
- I find myself becoming aggressive even while playing a game
for fun.
- I struggle emotionally with the things in life that "aren't
fair."
- Although I realize that it may not be right, I sometimes blame
others for my problems.
- More often than not I use sarcasm as a way of expressing humour.
- I may act kindly toward others on the outside, yet feel bitter
and frustrated on the inside.
If you identified with
4-8 of the above statements, your anger is probably more constant
than you would like. If you identified with 9 or more, there is
a strong possibility that you have struggled with periods of anger
or rage, whether you are aware of it or not.
(Adapted from "The Anger Workbook," written by Dr. Les Carter
and Dr. Frank Minirth) Return to top
TESTIMONIES
If you have a testimony
you would like to share on how God has helped you to deal with
your anger, we would love you to contact
us and share your story. Return to top
|
