Testimonies...

Liz

I have been very thankful and aware of the healing that God has done in my heart over the last 5 years. As a new believer He immediately surrounded me with mature godly women in a Bible study group. Many groups followed that first one and there were many caring, wise teachers who were instrumental to my spiritual growth. Some of the studies were called “Lord, Heal My Hurts”, “Lord, Give Me a Heart for You”, “Transformation”, and “Character”.

Before Celebrate Recovery I saw the changes in me only as healing, but since November I realize that I am in recovery. In October God put a book into my hands entitled “12 Steps for The Christian”. I completed that book days before CR began and it gave me an introduction to the 12 step program and began planting seeds. The early weeks at CR were very difficult for me. I had no previous experience with a support group and the depth of the women's pain ripped my heart apart. Most of the women said they were Christians but each week as they shared about the past it was like they were choosing to live in the chains of their past. Jesus has promised them healing and freedom, but they believe they are not able to move into a healthy present. They so much need people to be witnesses as encouragement that they too can move forward.

I believe that God wants me to be transparent with my struggles, and to be one of His vessels encouraging them to believe and trust. As I strive to do this God is pressing me forward; challenging and moving me out of my comfort zone. Rick Warren from Saddleback Church has an excellent quote which is a Principle of spiritual momentum: God works best with moving objects (in faith)”.

In March I began work on the 12 step program. Step 1 became a reality to me almost 5 years ago, around 18 months before I gave my life to Christ. I realized back then that my life had become unmanageable. That awareness was instrumental in asking God to help me since I could go on no longer. My first time in church in over 30 years was on January 4, 1998 . Chuck Congram, the Pastor at Lakeshore St. Andrew's Church, gave a challenging message, which was to drive the stake into the ground that my life would be different from that day on. He read aloud Matthew 11:28-30 and those words have given me strength and a foundation through today. “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

Right now in my journey I am realizing just how much Jesus wants me to come to Him,
follow Him, and learn from Him. He is inviting me to totally open up my life to Him. God led me through step 2 during my time spent in those Bible studies. The last couple of years before becoming a Christian was filled with insanity and after giving my life to Him He began restoring me to sanity through a relationship with Him and studying God's word.

Step 3 began in July 1999 when I invited Jesus Christ to come into my heart and into my life as my Lord and Saviour. I am so grateful to God for the journey that He has me on. More than anything I want my life to be pleasing and acceptable to Him. This is my spiritual act of worship; surrendering myself to Him as a living sacrifice. Step 4 began this spring when I made a commitment to daily pray the search me prayer in Psalm 139:23-24.  “Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.”

Every time I prayed I got a sense that I was to stop drinking a nightly glass of wine which has been my routine for the past 20 years. That was the only thing that kept surfacing during my prayer time. On a Good Friday the service at Lakeshore St. Andrew's, which was called “The goat has left the building”, referring to bondages that are in our lives. It was then that I understood what God was prompting me to do. I had not seen that glass of wine as bondage, but now I believe God did and He does not want it in my life. I made a decision that day and said yes to God. I prayed asking Him to take away from me the desire for that glass of wine and to give me strength during times of temptation. He has been answering that prayer.

Step 5; I shared with a few close friends in the Lord my wrongs and struggles surrounding that nightly glass of wine. Those sisters have kept me in their prayers and I am very aware of the healing God has given me since then. I continued to pray that search me prayer and asked God to reveal any other character defects in me. Each time He prompted me to abstain completely from all alcohol. I did not understand why because I was not abusing it. I would have 1 or 2 bottles a week with friends after our hockey game or baseball game.

The night before the Women's Retreat I had 1 beer after my baseball game. The speaker at the retreat put out an invitation to anyone who wanted to speak with her to see her after the session. I felt a very strong prompting that I needed to go and talk with her. I tried to dismiss it, but could not so I went to see her. I explained to her that I did not know what I was to talk with her about, but that I was only being obedient to the prompting. I shared with her about a dream, a purpose that God has put into my heart. She began to pray about that dream and then suddenly said that she was being led to share something with me. She said that I am putting something into my body that was not pleasing to God. It is not a part of His plans for me. I was so overwhelmed in my spirit; I knew exactly what He wanted. The tears streamed down my face. I told her that I didn't know why I needed to speak with her, but God sure knew.

That afternoon in prayer I submitted to God that I would abstain from alcohol. I am once again so grateful to Him for another change He has made in me. CR last week was again an affirmation that I am on the road to recovery. Voluntarily submit to every change God wants to make in my life and humbly ask Him to remove my character defects. “Happy are those whose greatest desire is to do what God requires.”

God is moving me forward into step 7. He has put a mentor into my life; a godly woman who shares her wisdom and pieces of her journey with me. God put it on my heart that our next talk would be about purity. So last weekend I completed a study on purity and also on sanctification. After searching out and recording scripture God has given me a better understanding of the life He wants me to live. And that study led me back to Matthew 11:28-30.

I thank God for Celebrate Recovery, and for the fellowship with all of the leaders and the volunteers.

Take care and God bless.

In Christ's love,   Liz